The Key Difference is Your Why
I had a coaching call with a girl who said she wanted to be an actress and singer. She said she felt lost and didn’t know what to do and how to get there. She threw a bunch of specific questions regarding which acting school to choose, how to break in, etc. I waited and quietly asked her:
WHY DO YOU WANT TO DO THIS?
She paused for a second, thinking, and then started a speech about what she wanted in life: money, fame, and her impatience to succeed.
I said, well, these are all good things in themselves, but they are all out of your control. And how do you define success, anyway? Winning an Oscar? Or being a multi-millionaire?
I then said, asking “why” is a big part in acting. That’s how we get the characters. Why is this character saying this or doing that? What does this character want and why?
But why do you ask these questions in acting, but not in your life?
I believe this happened to a lot of you, or at least you’ve heard similar stories. And I have to admit, although I never chased money or fame, I was impatient to succeed, without a clear picture of what success looks like to me.
And the consequence? I felt like I could never reach my goal — it seemed so far away and there was never enough time. I had to deal with doubt and judgment from my family, which I pretended I didn’t care but I did. I was hurt — angry and disappointed — that almost no one understood me. I was living in separation and constant emotional pain, which was almost entirely self-created.
Too often we spend time working on our next step, working on the “how” and the “what”, while ignoring the “why”. But the “how”s and the “what”s serve the WHY, not the other way around.
We may get things done and get paid handsomely, by focusing on “what” and “how”, but innovation and evolution come from the “why”. And that’s the difference between doers and makers.
Asking the “why” question can be uncomfortable. It forces us to look deep inside our hearts and listen to the voice we’ve been trying to suppress. If we do so, we may make shocking discoveries about ourselves and risk getting our lives turned upside down.
But that’s also how you morph into a new being. If you cannot deal with the discomfort and fear of getting deep into the core of your why, you will not fly out from the cocoon.
And your new life only just starts after the soul-searching of your why. The real challenge lies not in the moment of epiphany, but in your daily implementation of connecting your actions to your purpose. The real challenge is to stay on your track and believe this is what you’re born to do, even if no one understands.
“The real challenge is not to return to the level of mediocrity that the prevailing social consciousness agrees on merely because we don’t see anyone else doing what we are doing.
True leadership never needs confirmation from others. It just requires a clear vision and a change in energy — that is, a new state of being — that is sustained for a long enough period of time and executed with a strong enough will that it causes others to raise their own energy and become inspired to do the same.”
Excerpt From: Dr. Joe Dispenza. “Becoming Supernatural: How Common People Are Doing the Uncommon.” Apple Books.
Focus on YOU for whatever you want to come to you. There is nothing in the universe that cannot be found inside of you. Keep asking yourself why, and the big bang of your universe will start from there.
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